Bomb jokes
Americans are so fat that they named an atom bomb "Fat Man" to describe themselves.
What do you call a 60 year old with a bomb?
Suicide Boomer.
Where did Johnny go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
Q: Why is Japan the healthiest country?
A: Last time they had a fat man, 80,000 people died.
When the school shooter throws a smoke bomb into the classroom, and the autistic kid thinks it's a dance party.
If I get an atom, I would split it with you.
What did Nicki Minaj say when she sat next to a bomb?
"Bang bang right through the roof. Bang bang all over you."
A Black man walked into a bar.
What do you call a ghost's fart?
A spirit bomb.
Wonder why the Japanese people didn't see the bombs coming?
They didn't open their eyes.
Person 1: "Where was Hiroshima?"
Person 2: "In Japan."
Person 1: "No wonder! That's why they never saw it coming."
Where are fart bombs made?
Old people's arses!
There once were 3 men on an airplane and one bit into an apple and said, "This is disgusting!" and threw it out the window. The 2nd man bit into a banana and said, "This is rotten!" and he threw it out the window. The 3rd man bit into a bomb and screamed, "ALL MY TEETH FELL OUT!" and he threw it out the window.
Meanwhile, on the ground, a police officer was walking and he saw a kid crying and he went up to him and asked him why he was crying. He replied, "An apple came flying out of the sky and hit me on the head!" The police officer said, "That is weird," and kept on walking. Then he saw another kid crying and the police officer asked, "Why are you crying?" and he answered, "A banana came flying out of the sky and hit me on the head!" The officer said, "This has been a strange day." Then he sees a kid laughing and he asked why he was laughing and he said, while he was laughing, "My dad farted and the house blew up!"
Sally jumped out a plane, she forgot her parachute!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally...
How did she die?
A bomb came down whilst falling through the sky.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
A bomb.
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Because she had no arms."
"Why couldn’t she get up off the ground?" "Because she had no friends."
"Knock knock." "Who’s there?" "Not Susie, she’s still on the ground."
"Where did Susie go when the bomb went off?" "Everywhere."
"Why couldn’t Susie scratch her leg?" "Because it was in a different body bag."
"Why did Susie drop her ice cream?" "She was hit by a bus."
"Why did Susie fall off the swing?" "Someone threw a refrigerator at her."
Germany: As long as America stays out of the war, we should win.
Japan: *bombing Pearl Harbor* Cowabunga It Is!!
Did you hear about the Boston marathon? 'Cause, well, I heard it was a blast and that it blew everyone away!
Me: I bombed the 2 tests yesterday.
Friend: What were the tests about?
Me: Japan.
What is the best type of bath bomb?
A toaster.
I talked to a future suicide bomber. I told him, "ISIS ain't got sh** on me because I planted a bomb and lived."