Bomb jokes
My name is Jafar. I come from afar. There's a bomb in my car. Allahu Akbar!
Q: Wanna see something funny?
A: Sure.
*bomb Florida*
Yo mama so fat, a bombing and 89 stories didn't kill her.
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.
The boyfriend says to the explosive dude: "You're the bomb!" The explosive dude says: "Wow, that was Whitty."
Why are Japanese people's eyes so squinted?
Do you know how bright an atomic bomb is?
They found water on Mars. Mars:1 Africa:0
What do you get when you put a suicide bomber in a wheel chair? An RC-XD.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Orphans don't get picked.
What country has been the hottest in recent years?
Sri Lanka, they had 3 bombs in a day!
A: Knock knock.
B: Who's there?
A: Package from Ted Kaczynski.
B: Package from Te-?
A: BOOM!
I woke up today, and my mom said it was 1940.
I lost my black friend in the shadows. I lost my white friend on the wall. I lost my Asian friend in the sand and I lost my Islamic friend in the bombings.
Where did Holly go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
A farm full of cows were bombed, and only two survived. All of the udders died.
Why is America better than Japan at rapping?
Because we're better at dropping bombs.
What do you call a swimming terrorist? A bath bomb.
What do you call a dwarf suicide bomber?
A party popper.
What did the fat man say as he entered Nagasaki?
Nothing, he just exploded.
Have any of you guys heard the classic airplane jokes? Here's a good example...
A farmer, a doctor, and a terrorist are on a plane. An engine fails, and they are going to crash, so the pilot asks everyone to throw out some items. The farmer threw out his apple harvest, the doctor threw out medical supplies, and the terrorist, (not needing a bomb apparently) threw out his briefcase of bombs. They still crashed, and they started walking to the nearest town. They passed a boy who was running. "Why are you running?"
"My dad got hit by a shiny red object and now he's bleeding!"
They three of them decide it's best to keep quiet, and continue. They then passed a crying girl, who said that her brother had been killed by a scalpel from heaven. They said nothing and continued. Finally, they see a boy laughing so much he is in tears. They ask him, "What's so funny?"
"Grandma farted and the house blew up!"
How can you tell that a woman is asking for sex? Wait for her to drop a bomb on you.
What do you call a terrorist in a kids' swimming pool?
A bath bomb.