B.A.L.L.S. jokes
Do you know Putin?
Put in these balls in your mouth.
In Israel, they chop convicted rapists' balls off. Sure glad I don't live in Israel.
Don't tell me I haven't got balls. I just happen to wear mine on my chest, and I can guarantee they're a lot bigger than yours!
"Your mum has very small balls. Congrats! I told her, your balls are bigger than your husband's."
Kenya? Ligma balls!
I replaced "Jingle Bells" with "Jiggle Balls"... "Jiggle balls, jiggle balls, jiggle all the way! Oh what fun it is to ride on jiggly balls today!"
What is a pile of balls?
Your balls are growing too big that they will pop like a balloon!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Alex.
Alex who?
Lalicks your balls.
You don't have any balls.
Saying balls go into pussy.
I kicked a soccer ball at the kid in the wheelchair. Now we're playing Rocket League.
Jonny went to Disney and they had sour balls. He asked the cashier for some and he pulled down his pants.
Jay and Andrew are best friends who are almost alike. The difference between them both is Jay is poor and well... Andrew, on the other hand, is suck-a-dick poor. Let me explain, Jay wakes up in his room, walks to the kitchen, and asks his mom, Lisa (I call her Lisa now, btw), if there is anything to eat. "No, bitch!" she replies, so Jay drinks a glass of milk and goes back to bed.
Now Andrew... wakes up, jumps out of bed, and he's in the kitchen. He sees his mom fixing some food for work after a long hard night of giving her husband blue balls. "Anything left for me, Mother?" Andrew asks. "Sorry, Honey, I have to eat to put food on the table and to get the running again." *so she goes to work, taking her time* Andrew sits by his bedside and says to himself, "Man... I'd suck a dick for some water right now." *his mom storms back after hearing what he had said* "I'll buy you a soda if you do my first customer for me!"
What's the difference between a baby and a bowling ball?
A bowling ball doesn't cry when you put your fingers in it.
A mouse is just like a ball bearing.
Drench them in oil, and they stop squeaking.
What happens when you kick a boy in the balls?
THEY NUTS ARE IN PAIN.
There's a kid with loads of new firemen equipment and sees a fire engine go past and the kid asks the firemen, "Come have a look at my new gear." So the firemen go look at his gear, so then the kid says:
"I've got a helmet, a big jacket, and an oxygen tank, and a little wheelbarrow for my gear."
Firemen say: "Why is there a rope tied around a cat's balls?"
The kid says, "So I can have a siren nnnnnnnnnnneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwweeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn"
My bad, I kick me bad in if balls, and he got so fucking mad.
Why are dogs born with balls?
They were having their stick moment when they got given birth, too.