We clap when we see you. We clap our hands over our eyes.
If someone is bullying you for being fat, remember, you're the bigger person, a MUCH bigger person.
Why are emos jealous of light?
The lights are hanging.
Principal: “Why did you have to skip class? Because of that detention!”
Kid: “Whatever!”
Principal: “Why did you have to swear? Because of that one demerit!”
Kid: “Doesn't matter!”
Principal: “Why did you yell at a teacher and throw a chair at them? Because of that you're suspended!”
Kid: “Oh well!”
Principal: “Why did you have to push a kid down the stairs and kill them? Because of that you're expelled!”
Kid: “I'm trying not to kill myself!”
I hate school. I mean, why can't you pull out a 12 gauge and shoot everyone, including the teachers?! This generation is too soft, man.
You're the sun in my life, now get 93 million miles away from me.
Tiktoker: I will kill anyone who pours milk before cereal.
Depressed kid tiktok reply: *pours milk before cereal, pours cereal then takes a bite* I'll wait.
Lesson in laziness number 136894236842: don't be too lazy to read large numbers.
You're so emo, the sun turned black.
Some people are such treasures that you sometimes just wanna bury them.
If you're gay, does that mean you're sexist?
My friend: Hey, why are you always smiling?
Me: 'Cause life is a joke and we’re all slacking it off.
Thanks to the voice who keeps telling me to let go,
he is my only motivation for trying again.
James Bond: Vodka martini.
Bartender: Shaken, not stirred.
James Bond: Do I look like I give a damn?
Why is the blind kid popular?
He can't see the middle fingers.
I threw a lamp at an emo kid and told him to lighten the f*ck up.
Why did the emo kid leave the food on the table?
It was the Happy Meal.
To anyone suffering from low self esteem:
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/UTymDoPOEnY
Ariana Grande agrees with me on something: women belong in the kitchen and bedroom.
Suicide isn't funny, but you can spice it up by wearing a fun hat.
