Amoeba jokes
Why are Amoebas so bad at math?
Because, when they need to multiply, they divide.
Why don't you act like an amoeba and split?
Ancestry.com is spelled with an “I” in Alabama.
God: ok, what if I made an evil land octopus that could walk on walls?
Mole
Most people think an octopus has 8 legs.
Actually, they have 6 legs and 2 arms. How can you tell which are the arms?
Hit it on the head. The two that go up to the head when he says "Owwww" are his arms.
Why are ant colonies very healthy? Because they have lots of antibodies.