All of the jokes are just abuse
Random person: Imma smack you so hard your skin pigment changes!
Me: Who the hell do you think you are? Michael Jackson’s dad?
7 little children gathered around the bed Bill Cosby's fantasy.
All he wants to do is tickle the kids, it's as plain as can be.
7 cellmates gathered around the bed ready to rape Bill Cosby instead.
My girlfriend broke up with me. She said I was a pedophile. I told her, “PEDOPHILE? Wow, that sure is a big word for an eight-year-old!”
What is a pedophile's favorite job?
The mall santa.
You know you have a domestic abuse problem when you beat your dick.
What did the pedophile say to the kids?
"FUCK!"
Why do I call my dog a vibrator?
Because every time my dog acts like a dildo, I beat him, and when I beat him, he shakes. What do you call a shaking dildo? A vibrator, therefore I call my dog a vibrator.
What's the difference between McDonald's and a priest?
Nothing... They both stick their meat in ten-year-old buns.
What do you call an all-you-can-eat buffet for a pedophile? A school bus.
They should add an eleventh commandment to the Bible:
Thou shalt not f... altar boys.
Q: How can you tell that a pedophile likes music?
A: He rapes D minor.
Why do pedophiles never cum first?
Because they like to cum in a little behind.
What do you call a cross between a priest and a child?
The cross shoved up the priest’s ass as he ‘downward dogs’ the kid.
What's the first thing that a battered woman does when she gets out of the shelter?
My last if she knows what's good for her.
What do 100,000 battered women have in common? The bitch was wrong!
I'd tell a joke about my abusive dad, but I only remember the punch line.
What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?
Nothing, you've told her twice.
A pedophile is playing poker with 8 seven-year-olds.
The pedophile has a pair of 7's and three 4's in the river. He smiles and says, "Yay, I got me a full house!"
What's the best thing about abuse jokes? The punchline.