Worst Jokes Ever
You don't need brains to be a Boss.
When the body was first created, all the parts wanted to be Boss. The brain said, "I should be Boss because I control all of the body's responses and functions."
The feet said, "We should be Boss since we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go."
The hands said, "We should be the Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money."
Finally, the asshole spoke up. All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole being the Boss. So, the asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work.
Within a short time, the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic, and the brain fevered. Eventually, they all decided that the asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed. All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the shit!
Moral Of The Story: You don't need a brain to be a Boss----any asshole will do.
These jokes are weak like the structure of the towers.
99% of women kiss with their eyes closed, that's why it's so hard to identify the rapist.
My "choco" is too "late" for lunch.
What is red and very rare?
A child in a blender.
Why can orphans travel around so much? They never get homesick.
What did the caveman say while seeing a reptile taking off?
Look at that dino-sour!
What do gay people and mice have in common?
They both hate pussy cats!
What do a blonde and a doorknob have in common?
Everyone gets a turn ;)
A woman walks into a dentist's office, sits on the counter, and spreads her legs.
The dentist says, "I think you have the wrong idea with that." The woman replies, "Last week you gave my husband his false teeth; now you can get them out."
What do the initials NOW stand for?
(A.) National Organization For Women
(B.) National Organization of Whores
(C.) All the above
Answer:
Since the initials NOW can stand for anything, the correct answer is all the above.
I once dated a math teacher. It turned out she was nothing but problems.
You ever hear of a reverse exorcism?
It's where the devil tells the priest to get out of the child.
What’s one thing you can say at a funeral and during sex?
She was too young.
Funny thing happened today, my dad came home from work which is weird cause he’s a suicide bomber.
Head teacher talking about recent vandalism during school assembly:
"And to those of you who wrote Mr. Smith's telephone number on the door of the girl's toilets, he would like to make it clear that the last digit is a 7 and not a 4."
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but a crowbar could do it so much quicker.
These are all racist. 😂
My girlfriend told me the dishwasher was leaking, so I brought home some tampons.
The difference between my life and a joke is that a joke has meaning.