Worst Jokes Ever
What is the best cure for aging?
Suicide.
Q: If George Washington was alive today, what would he do?
A: Scratch mercilessly at the coffin walls, while screaming at the top of his lungs!
Children should never run with scissors, and lesbians should never scissor with the runs.
What's a similarity between your best friend and a tree?
They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.
What do you call a candle in armor?
A knight light.
Doctor: "I have good news and I have worse news." Patient: "Well, what's the bad news?" Doctor: "You have one day left to live." Patient: "What news could possibly be worse?" Doctor: "I've been trying to contact you since yesterday!"
Stephen Hawking died because he accidentally lost his bluetooth connection.
If drinking alcohol makes you an alcoholic, does drinking Fanta make you fantastic?
My dad posted a picture of his condom challenge fail to his social media - it was a picture of me.
Come on guys, please let's play Roblox. My name is xX_robloxGamer420Po_Xx.
What do you call a boomerang that never comes back?
Daddy.
What's worse than eating 5 raw oysters out of your grandmother's vagina?
Realizing you only put in 4.
You’re Russian when you go to the bathroom and Finnish when you come out. What are you in the bathroom?
European.
I love Muslims, they are great at parties!
They have the best fireworks.
When you send her a dick pic, but then she sends you one right back...
What do you call a white man in court?
SUPERIOR!
Why do Down's kids blend in in geometry?
Their foreheads are angled.
Q: Why do Norwegian ships have bar codes on them?
A: So when they come into port they can Scan-Da-Navy-In!
A guy walks into a mosque... then blows up.
Justin: Hey.
Josh: Hey man.
Justin: Why only "man"?
Josh: It feels weird saying the r a c e y names.
Justin: I don't mind.
Josh: Okay, S L A V E.
Justin: Oh no, not T H A T one!