Worst Jokes Ever
My dad died during 9/11, he was the best pilot in all Saudi Arabia.
What's the difference between a depressed person and a pizza?
Pizza won't cut itself.
What's the difference between property and women? At least property still retains some value after getting wrecked.
roses are red, unlike the rest, I'm the one who has your IP address.
I saw a Cuban prisoner. I asked, "Why are you running from the cops?" He said, "I'M FREE AT LAST!"
A little riddle...
Trump has it short, Kennedy has it long, the Pope has it but he doesn't use it, what is it?
...
Obviously the Surname, what are you thinking about you pervert?
It’s important to establish a good vocabulary. If I had known the difference between the words “antidote” and “anecdote,” one of my best friends would still be alive.
You masturbate...
AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
You won't get any Squirtle and Bulbasaur pets.
What do you call a German man who can't see?
A not see.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they all sit in the dark and cry.
To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos. Then I made pizza because they don’t live in a swing state.
You’re not completely useless. You can always be used as a bad example.
An Asian walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Do you, too, sing 'One Long Toy Cow'?"
The bartender says to the Asian, "Sorry, I don't speak Chinese."
What does a Trump supporter use to load his/her AR-15?
A MAGAzine.
"Hee hee touch my pp."
Joe mama is so fat, Dora can't explore her.
What do you call a genderless child?
It's not a mister, it's not a misses, I'm more for a mystery.
Do you know why the cake doesn't ever fight anyone?
He says, "Take a peace of that!" while entering a fight.
I would roast you, but you don't have any meat!
Joe mama so fat, she fell on both sides of the bed.
I respect cancer more than I respect depression.
At least cancer has the balls to kill you himself.
You heard that Michael Jackson autopsy reports showed he died of food poisoning?
It’s because he ate some 8 year old nuts.