Worst Jokes Ever

Women.

What's the difference between a baby and a freezer?

The freezer doesn't scream when I put my meat in it.

Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.

What's better than winning gold at the Paralympics?

Not being retarded.

I wish you guys all died.

What sort of file turns a one inch hole into a two inch hole?

A pedophile.

What is black and screams?

Stevie Wonder answering the iron.

How do you tell when a blonde just lost her virginity?

Her crayons are still wet.

I saw my sister masturbating with a carrot. I said, "Come on, I was gonna eat that later! Now it's just gonna taste like carrots!"

Why did the midget not go to bed?

He couldn't reach the bed.

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

What was the pedophile charged with when he was arrested? A minor offense.

What's the similarity between women and car parking spaces? The good ones are always taken, and sometimes when nobody's looking, you slip in the disabled one.

What do you do after you eat the softest pussy in the world?

Put the diapers back on.

If Stephen Hawking has a heart attack, do you take him to Halfords or A&E?

Muslims commit suicide to go to Paradise and get 72 virgins... I just go to the local primary school.

What is Hitler's least favorite month?

Jewly.

What's a pedophile's favorite part of a hockey game? Before the first period starts.

What did the rapist say to his victim?

"Go ahead, call the police. We will see who comes first."

My friend told me he had a sister. I asked if she was hot, and he said she was 8. That wasn't my question.