Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

An American and a Russian are talking. The American says, "We in America have the best democracy. We can stand in front of the White House and shout with impunity: \"The American President is a moron!\""

"We can do that too," says the Russian, walking with the American to the Kremlin and shouting: "The American President is a moron!"

I broke up with my girlfriend and stole her wheelchair.

Guess who likes vegetables now?

Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?

Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.

Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!

Stacy: lol

I went up to the deaf kid and said, "I’m going to punch you in 3, 2, 1." And he ended up with a broken nose, and I said, "You should have listened to me!"

Why is an orphan's least favorite day field trip day?

Because they can't get a parent's signature.

What's the opposite of an exorcism?

When Satan has to tell the priest to come out of the child...

Why did the blonde have sex with the Mexican?

Because her teacher told her she had to do an essay.