Worst Jokes Ever
Why are carpenters never horny after work?
Because they’ve already spent all day getting hammered and nailing things.
Who is Bill Cosby’s favorite Disney princess?
Sleeping Beauty.
What do you call a serial killer that only kills fat people?
A mass murderer.
Why did the emo kid get mad?
I wore a “Just Do It” shirt.
What’s the difference between Santa and my dad?
Santa got the milk.
How does Hellen Keller meet men?
She goes on blind dates.
Why was Helen Keller slurring her fingers?
She was drunk.
What’s the most emo country in the world?
Qatar.
Why didn’t the emo attend her grandma’s funeral?
She thought her grandma was trying to flex.
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are all in the 9th grade. Which one is the sexiest?
The blonde, because she’s the only one who’s 18.
What do you call a stoned kid with Down syndrome?
A baked potato.
My friend: “Vaporeon is my favorite Pokémon.”
Me: “Hey, did you kno-“
I got kicked out of flight school, so I decided to learn from the experienced pilots (Isis).
My mom smashed my Xbox, so I smashed her daughter. 😏
Why do emos suck at playing tic-tac-toe on their wrists?
Because when they win, they lose.
What do an emo girl and a blind girl have in common?
Black is their favorite color.
What do you call two brunettes and a blonde in the NFL?
Two tight ends and a wide receiver!
Why do people in Alabama like peanut butter and jelly?
Because it's in bread.
Who would win in a fight, in a boxing ring? Mike Tyson or Helen Keller with a Tommy gun?
Mike Tyson. Helen Keller never heard the bell.
Roses are red, violets are blue, You're so flat we can play chess on your chest!