Worst Jokes Ever
Bro, go work at McDonald's. Your hairline inspired their logo!
Wanna know the last words of the south tower?
"HAHA LOOK AT YOU! IMAGINE BEING HIT YOU L BOZO!"
How many CIA agents does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
They don't need lightbulbs--they glow in the dark.
Yo mama's so fat, when she went to the beach in a blue dress, everyone screamed "tsunami!"
Did you see the blind guy trip on a can?
He didn't either.
Which falls faster, an apple or an emo kid?
The apple, because the emo kid is hanging.
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing. You already done told her twice.
What do you call 2 nuns and a prostitute that play football?
Two tight ends and a wide receiver.
As an older brother, I always gave my little sister advice. I always said to do your best and never quit. So one day I went to her room. I see my sister giving married men blow jobs.
I ask what are you doing? The married men said she is giving us blow jobs because our wives don't do it. My sister said you told me to do your best, and my best is to suck them dry. As a brother, I couldn't be more prouder.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
What's the difference between a gay man and a freezer?
A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
How do you get "Dick" from Richard?
Ask him nicely.
After having a win at bingo, Ethel splashed out on some venison for tea.
During the meal, her daughter asked her mum what it was, to which she replied with a little smile... "It's what I call your father."
Little Jimmy threw down his knife and fork and jumped up sayin', "Oh My God! Don't eat it!!! It's a fucking Dick!"
I'll rate this a 9/11.
Why did the AI go to school?
To upgrade from "Artificially Intelligent" to "Artificially Hilarious"!
Ha ha ha. It is so funny. I hope you enjoy, fellow humans.
What's another name for cumming inside a woman?
Loading the dishwasher.
what did Bruce Willis say after he had a vasectomy? "snip-y ki yay motherfucker"
The adoption center threw a party. Why? 'Cause the parents weren't home.
- Sometimes I feel like killing myself...
- But?
- ...
Your hairline's so ugly, it turned Medusa to stone!