There was a woman. She is property. Ha, sucks for that dishwasher.
What is the similarity between women and freezers?
We like to put our meat in them.
What do tampons and your sister have in common?
Why does it take three women with PMS to screw in a lightbulb?
IT JUST DOES!!!!
Man, I love this joke: Women's rights.
Why do blondes wear tight skirts?
To keep their legs closed.
What happened when the 400+ women ate a slice of cake?
She died the next weekend.
What do TVs and girls have in common?
They both show you stuff when you turn them on!
Why do women wear makeup and perfume?
Because they're ugly and smell bad.
I like my women like my family, they’re related.
Three women—a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead—are riding through the desert on a dune buggy. About two hours later, their vehicle dies with no gas, and they're forced to travel to their destination on foot, but they all agree to carry something with them.
The brunette brings canteens of water.
The redhead takes a large beach umbrella.
The blonde somehow rips off the car door.
The redhead asks her, "Why did you take the whole car door?"
To which the blonde replied, "So I can roll down the window in case it gets too hot."
A man walks into a bar and orders 3 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down?"
The man says, "I just found out my niece is gay." The next day, he orders 4 shots of whiskey. The bartender asks, "What's got you down now?" The man says, "I just found out my son is gay."
The next day, he orders 6 shots of whiskey. The bartender says, "Got anybody who likes women?" The man says, "My wife does."
Why do women have periods?
Because they deserve them, haha!
An ugly man with a gun walks into a bar. He sees a woman and falls in love with her.
Man: "Hey, cute lady!"
Woman: "Leave me alone, you ugly two-faced man! I already have a boyfriend."
Man: "Not for long!"
And then the man shoots the woman's boyfriend.
Woman: "How dare you murder such a beautiful man!"
Man: "Now you shall be my girlfriend."
Woman: "Never."
And then the man takes the seat that the woman's boyfriend was sitting in before.
Man: "You look like a dream."
Woman: "Then open up your ugly eyes and stop sleeping, murder."
Man: "What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the world, compared to all those ugly women? Bleuch!"
Woman: "What's it like being the ugliest mother f***ing murder in the world, compared to all those beautiful men?"
And then the man orders flowers and candy.
Bartender: "We don't serve flowers, or candy."
And the man shoots the bartender.
Another man can't believe what he just saw, so he strangles the first man and throws him out.
Why do women fart when they pee to blow dry
There was a doctor's room filled with 20 women, 4 kids, 15 men, and 1 dog. However, there were forty foreheads. How is this possible?
(They will think 44 heads, not 40 foreheads.)
Because there are 40 foreheads, not 44 heads.
A man walks into a bar, and says "Ouch!" And the women look at him as if they have never seen a man walk into a bar before.
Q: What do women and KFC have in common?
A: Once you eat the breasts and thighs, all you have left is a greasy box to put your bone in.
There are sexiest women in politics.
They should be in a car showroom.
Why do men sag their pants so low and still wear a belt?
The same reason women bring their purse on a date and don't pay.
