Woman jokes
"Abracadabra! Alacuzam! See that woman? She’s now a man."
"After the man got some sun, I turned this banana into a gun! Now look! I now have your phone, Apple Watch, and your credit card!"
Which is better looking, girls or women?
How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? All of them if you keep reloading.
The person who made it a law to not hurt girls is stupid because we've all kicked a pregnant woman before we were even born.
"Popcorn" means "Photo-Oxidant formation by Plant-emitted Compounds and OH Radicals in Northeastern Germany."
"HO" means a woman, in particular one who has many casual sexual encounters or relationships. So basically, popcorn is a woman in plant based sex encountered a lot in a nazi camp.
What does a cannibal call a pregnant woman?
A Kinder Surprise egg.
90,900,00,1090,279402% of girls are raped. 67% of women are raped. So I guess girls are sexier than women! Who agrees? Please comment: Good or Bad.
Gwen pegs Xavier.
What do you call a thirsty girl?
An H2Hoe.
Why should old women never eat seafood?
'Cause then she'll start acting crabby.
A guy walks into a bar, he's like, "What's your number, lad?" and the woman is like, "298-777-fatso.com" and he walked home depressed.
123 bipity bopity 321. Women are property.
A woman walked up to me and asked me for a joke. I stood there with a straight face knowing women can't be funny.
My sister asked me what is dark humor. I asked what does a cannibal call a pregnant woman? "Kinder Surprise!"
What do you call a lost Indian woman? Ms. Singh.
When I was watching my daughter at the park earlier, another parent asked a man, "Which one is yours?" and he replied, "I'm still choosing." She looked horrified.
How can you tell that a woman cannot fit through a vent because she got pregnant from a baby elephant? Ain't no telling who's in better shape, the elephant or the woman. I guess it's probably Weight Watchers.
I just had a birthday party last week at my crib. I invited two fine, beautiful looking women. One was skinny and her name was Kelly, and the other one was overweight and her name was Chiquita.
Both of them came by. I told Chiquita only Kelly can stay and enjoy my birthday. You can't, you're too fat and clumsy, and I don't have any food or drinks for you, so see ya later, nutty professor.
Man to woman: "Would you sleep with me for one million dollars?"
Woman: "Sure."
Man: "How about for ten dollars?"
Woman: "What do you think I am?"
Man: "We’ve already established what you are. All we’re doing is negotiating price."
What do you call a fat woman that prays?
A holy cow.