I didn't trip and fall... I attacked the floor, and I believe I am winning :3
Q: Why don't pedophiles win races?
A: Because they like to come in a little behind.
What was the winning play at the leper football game?
A hand off up the middle.
I recently saw a pun contest in NYC. The owners said there was a maximum of 10 puns that I could submit. I wrote 10 puns and submitted all of them in hopes that at least one would win--however, no pun in ten did.
Why was 4 not impressed when 5 won a prize for 6?
Because 511472.
Stephen Hawking always wins musical chairs, as he’s always sitting down.
I entered ten puns into a contest to see which one would win.
No pun in ten did.
A man puts in ten jokes into a joke contest. He hopes that at least one will win. Sadly, no pun intended.
Two cats called "1,2,3" & "un, deux, trois" had a swimming race across the channel.
1,2,3 cat won because un, deux, trois cat sank!
What's the difference between Arsenal and West Ham?
Arsenal can win trophies and win games.
What's better than winning gold at the Paralympics?
Not being retarded.
Chuck Norris can win a game of Connect 4 in only three moves.
Why do pedophiles never win a race?
Because they are always coming in a little behind.
Chuck Norris wins a staring contest. -- Against Medusa.
