What do you call a Catholic priest who molests children?
A Catholic priest.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 Victims, they went through 89 stories in 7 seconds.
To the people who have seen "Meet The Fockers" at the movies and they hated it, Fock You, Motherfockers!
Did you know that Germany came up with sparkling water?
Who else would think of adding gas?
What do you call a kid with Down syndrome who dresses like a merman? Posiedown.
Why did Stephanie fall off the swing?
Because she has no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Not Stephanie!
Did you hear about the deaf man who got a ticket?
It's OK, he didn't either!
I used to have a friend who worked at a car shop who liked hunting.
I’m not friends with him anymore because he turned my dog into a car-pet.
What do you call someone who used to kill people? An ex-executioner.
What do you call a Mexican who lost his car?
- Carlos.
Knock knock. Who's there? Broken pencil. Broken pencil who? Never mind, it was pointless!
Why did Sally fall off the swings?
She had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally.
What do you call a guy with a bald head who loves to eat biscuits, raisins, and caster sugar?
Gary Baldy (Garibaldi)!
What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison?
A small medium at large!
Knock knock. Who's there? Ya. Ya who? Sorry, I prefer Google.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Daisy. Daisy who? Daisy me rollin', they hatin'!
Why did Sally fall off the swings?
Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not Sally!
Voldemort: Knock, knock.
Harry Potter: Who's there?
Voldemort: You know.
Harry Potter: You know who?
Voldemort: Exactly!
What do you call someone who points out the obvious? Someone who points out the obvious.
Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Heaven.
Heaven who?
Heaven fun over there?
