Unvaccinated jokes

Children who are unvaccinated are less likely to have autism. You know why?

-You have to be alive to have autism.

What is common with dark humor and unvaccinated kids?

Neither do ever grow old.

My mom asked my doctor, "Why is my unvaccinated baby crying?"

The doctor replied, "He's going through a midlife crisis."

How do you get Carrie Underwood to dehydrate fast?

Tell her that all the water supplies contain the COVID vaccine.

There's an outbreak of foot and mouth disease, it can affect pigs and cows.

I hope my teacher will be ok.

Me: spreading positivity.

Everyone else at the HIV testing center.

I'm a family doctor and I wish I could help but... you're an orphan.

So I'm banging the fuck out of this slutty chick, right?

And I'm thinking to myself, "She's PROBABLY got AIDS." So I go and get myself tested and, lo and behold, I'm positive.

This gets me thinking, "Where the fuck does an eight year old get AIDS?!"

"Who has my sister been hanging out with?!"