Unplugged jokes
My mom said I rely on my devices too much, so I unplugged her life support.
1. If being ugly was a crime, you would have a life sentence.
2. My phone battery lasts longer than your friendships.
3. There is a tree out there giving you oxygen, and you owe that tree an apology.
4. I don鈥檛 hate you, but I gotta unplug your life support to charge my phone.
5. When I saw your dad on the sidewalk, I didn鈥檛 laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.
6. If I had powers, I would make you the dumbest person alive, but it seems life already beat me to the punch.
7. If karma ever comes to punch ya in the face, I wanna be there to help it.
8. If I had a dollar for every time you said something smart, I鈥檇 be broke.
9. You are more disappointing than a cake without frosting.
10. Were you born on a highway, 'cause that鈥檚 where most accidents happen?
11. Wow, that hurts, now I know how it felt when your mom said that to ya.
12. You're the reason this country has to put directions on shampoo, and you may as well be the reason why the middle finger was invented.
My grandpa unplugged the AC, so I unplugged his life support.
My grandfather says I鈥檓 too reliant on technology. I call him a hypocrite and unplug his life support. 馃槃馃槅馃敟馃憤
My mom told me to unplug all the electronics, so I unplugged my grandma's life support.
My grandfather said we rely on technology too much, so I unplugged his life support. Luckily, I remember his last words: "You little bastard!"
When your mum tells you to help your granny.
And you unplug life support!
How did Stephen Hawking die?
He rolled away and his charger unplugged.
What did my grandpa say after he kicked the bucket?
Nothing, I unplugged his life support before he said a word.
He drove too far away from the wall, and the cord unplugged.
My grandpa said I'm too reliant on technology... so I screamed that he was a hypocrite and I unplugged his life support.
I went to see my grandfather in the hospital because I wanted to get to know him better before he passed, maybe take a selfie with him. But when I got there my phone died, so I unplugged a vacuum to plug in my phone. And it turns out he only knows Spanish, so when he kept saying, "Me desconectaste el soporte de mi vida," I thought he wanted water. But when I got back with the water he was asleep, and now my phone was charged, so I translated what he said. And it was, "You unplugged my life support." That's when I called the doctor...
Good news is, I got one sick selfie!
My father said I'm too reliant on technology.
I called him a hypocrite, and unplugged his life support.
There's a new horror movie about Stephen Hawking.
It's called "Unplugged!"
My grandfather says I鈥檓 too reliant on technology.
I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
So, about a year ago I was riding a horse, and out of nowhere the horse tried to flip me off it and I fell off. I would have been OK, but my foot got stuck in the stirrup. The horse dragged me along and didn't stop.
I would have died if it weren't for the Walmart manager who came out and unplugged the horse.
How did Stephen Hawking really die?
His wife grounded him from using electronics and unplugged everything!
Stephen Hawking drove too far from the wall and unplugged.
He also forgot to pay the power bill.
If you replaced the boss in Portal with a boy, you would hear Stephen Hawking.
My grandfather says I'm too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
He died because he rolled too far away from the wall outlet and got unplugged.