Their jokes

why don't emos live alone?they like to hang with their freinds.

Q: Why did the orphan get an iPhone X for their birthday?

A: 'Cause it don't have a home button.

Why can't orphans eat a large bag of chips? Because they're family size.

A wife and husband were setting up their computer, and the husband made the password "my dick." But the wife fell on the floor laughing because the computer said the password was too short.

What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common? - Their balls are just for decoration.

He sang a love song to a rat, yet stans are befuddled on why people keep calling their idol "Wacko Jacko".

I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don't understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, "what's so sad?" and she said "What do you think was running through these kid's heads before they died?" I replied "probably a bullet". She gasped and said "do you have any idea how insensitive that is? What do you think is running through their parent's heads?" I said "probably all the money they're losing from this funeral."

A cemetery should be built next to orphanages, so the orphans can see their parents.

It's April Fools' Day. I'm gonna go to the orphanage and tell kids, "Their parents are here to pick them up."

Why do Native Americans hate snow?

Because it's white and settles on their land.

Little Natalie was playing with matches. Her mother caught her, took them, whupped her, and told her never to play with matches again.

A few minutes later, Little Natalie was playing with matches again. The curtains caught fire, and the house burned down.

Another few minutes later, when she and her mother were sitting at their neighbors', her mother told her: "If you think I gave you a whupping, wait till your father gets home!"

Little Natalie just cackled with delight because she knew her father had gotten home earlier and gone upstairs to take a nap.

Why are Republicans supporting giving felons the right to vote?

Because their own personal jeebus is a felon!

A teacher asked his students a math question.

"You have one dollar. Your parents give you five dollars. How much money do you have?"

After some thinking, about half the class raised their hands. The teacher called on a little girl in the front.

"One dollar!" she said.

What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common?

They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.

Never break someone’s heart, they only have one.

Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

If prostitution had a tax-exempt status, and if an adult bookstore had a tax-exempt status because of a glory hole, churches would have to do something else to keep their tax-exempt status to avoid the risk of going out of business.

Today was a bad day. There was a man throwing butter and cheese at me, how dairy!

How are orphans and blind kids similar?

They both have never seen their parents :)

Jack and Jill went up the hill to celebrate their marriage.

Nine months later, they happily had some use for their baby carriage.

Two years later, they went up again, then their daughter had a brother.

But one little secret that no one knew was that Jack and Jill share a mother.

Why don't witches wear underwear?

So they can get a better grip on their broom.