SOS jokes
Guy, it was so weird yesterday. I saw a guy, and he kept repeating the same thing over and over. I hate people with dementia. I told my mom to get a new mirror, but she won’t listen to me. It’s almost like I said it like 20 times every time I say it.
Your forehead is so big that you dream on IMAX.
I was beefing with a dude in a wheelchair, so I took his wheelchair and threw it across the street and told him, "Walk it off, you will be fine."
Ask someone if they are a rhino. If they say yes, tell them "so you're horny." And if they reply yes again, block them from your life entirely.
Ur mom is so fat that when she came to the front door, she was already at the back door.
Yo mama so fat, when she was just there, she made the whole earth go back to the ice age!
Yo mama so fat, her birth certificate was an apology letter.
Your hairline is so [bad] Will Smith can't slap it back in place.
You are so skinny that the only difference between you and a leaf is color.
Why do so many people hate Bill Cosby? I mean, all he did was have affairs with drunk, attention-seeking women. They literally begged for it.
Your hairline is so big, it looks like the TITANIC.
Your hairline is so far back that the United States got a front row seat!
Having sex in an elevator is wrong. On so many levels.
You're so goddamn stupid, you thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
My fucking balls hurt so god damn bad, oh my god!
Why is the US so bad at Clash Royale? Because they already lost two towers.
Adam and Eve are going through the garden when Adam suddenly says, "What race are we?"
Eve responds with, "Ask God, he will tell you." So Adam goes over to a hill and asks, "God, what race are we?"
God says, "You are what you are."
Adam goes back to Eve and says, "We are white." Eve asks how he knew that. Adam responds with, "If we were black, he would have said 'you is what you is'."
So if you are bored, punch an orphan.
What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?🙄🙄
Why are orphans so bad at dodge ball?
They don't have a home to run to.
A man dies and goes to heaven. When he gets there, he sees an angel standing in the center of a room, surrounded by clocks. The man goes over to the angel and says, "What are these clocks for?" The angel looks at him. "These are lie clocks," the angel says, "every time someone lies, it ticks once. Mother Teresa never lied, so hers is at noon, and Honest Abe only lied twice." The man asks, "Where is Bill Clinton's clock?" The angel smiles, then points up at the fan.