What do you put on a cheeseburger? It's a wrap!
Once, there was a kid named Cale, but his classmates didn’t know it was spelled with a “C,” so they asked him if he could be their snack.
My cat is red and brown and her bones are crunchy, so does that mean she is a Kit Kat?
"Hey Modda, I'm hungry."
Peanut butter 🧈?
Zozo the hobo is single like a Pringle.
Single like a Pringle, and he loves Pringle's, get it?
joe: Are your mom and dad nice?
zozo: Well, they were until I murdered them over a bottle of Pringles.
joe: Oh, so you are an orphan and a murderer.
Every time I go to the store I look in the deodorant section and my dyslexia acts up. Instead of "antiperspirant," I read "antidepressant." At least I get a bunch of extra snacks out of my shopping mistakes.
This man walks into a bar and says, "How do I get service here?"
The assistant bar attendant tells him to take a seat as the bartender will be there to serve him shortly. After 2 minutes, the man says this is ridiculous, that he has to wait. The assistant then offers him a bar snack of free nuts, which the man duly eats. Another 2 minutes go by, and the man then says, "OK, I get it, no service of beer, but free nuts," to which the assistant says, "Hell no, the game starts in 10 minutes." Everyone laughs and claps.
What's the sun's favorite chocolate? Mars bar.
For orphans, every bag of chips is family size.
What’s the similarity between a bag of chips and a gun?
When you pull one out in class, everybody wants to be your friend.
What do Michael Jackson and caviar have in common? They both come on little white crackers.
What is a good nut?
A magic nut!
Dad I'm hungry hi hungry I'm dad 👋🍪🍩🍬🌮🍔🍗🍟🍤🍉🍭🍫🍰
Instead of walking through the door, the owner of the house broke in through the window.
When he came out, a man standing on the sidewalk walked up to him and asked why he hadn't just walked through the door. The owner responded, "I'm pollo vegetarian, and I really just wanted a bit of food."
When the man looked confused, the owner said, "Windows are nature's vending machine."
What did one nut say to the other nut? "Help!"
How do you get a baby into a small bowl?
A blender.
How do you get it out? Tostito chips.
What do french fries 🍟 do when they meet?
They ketchup.
I just busted a nut. A ginger nut.
