Smelt jokes

My Indian wife said last night if her fanny would taste like vindaloo curry, I said I've smelt your fucking armpits, you've got no chance.

What attracted Jeffrey Dahmer to abortion clinics?

- He smelled veal.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I took a poo, and it smelt like you.

Nobody

Literally nobody

Gordan Ramsey: do you need me to bring Hitler back to life so he can show you how to use a fucking oven?

What's the difference between a silver medal and a priest?

They both came in a little behind.

I would roast you, but you don't have any meat!

I would roast you but burning trash is bad for the environment.

So I was mining off the coast of Canada and one of my coworkers found gold. I said, "AU, bring that over here!"