Why did the duck walk across the road? I lost my pecker!
Why did the duck cross the road to get to his quack dealer?
Michael Jackson is pure cheese.
I mean, Jacko comes on a little cracker.
Bligitty blot, bliggity blit,
You better not be talkin' shit. 🔫
What's the difference between saying "bloody" in America and in the U.K.?
In the U.K., it's a swear word.
In America, it's a family reunion.
Stacy: Honey, I'm kinda new to texting, what does lol mean?
Justin: I'm not sure, "lots of love," I guess.
Margaret: Stacy, are you there? I don't know if you heard, but Amber and her three kids were killed in a car crash this morning. I'm in total shock!
Stacy: lol
What do you call a group of cops having a sleep over?
Pigs in a blanket.
Q: What is a lesbian's version of a cock block?
A: A beaver dam.
Why is jelly laughing a lot?
Because his friend goes nuts!
Q: How do emo kids complement each other?
A: I like your cuts g.
What do you call a virgin lying on a waterbed?
A cherry float.
Walk up to an emo and say, "I like your cuts G."
What do you call a special police officer?
Officer down!
I might slide up to your block with intelligence. I'm a genius with a glock. There's some relevance. Took his chain, took his rocks. Took his sediments. There's no cap inside my speech. No impediments.
Putting numbers on the board, I use my calculator. Put a opp below the floor, he's a denominator. E = mc2, you didn't notice that? Had the shot, but he's too scared. Why didn't he buss it back?
What kind of chocolate does a lesbian hate?
Ones that contain nuts.
What do you call a crazy lesbian?
Fruit Loops.
What do emo kids like to smoke?
"Marjuanakillmyself."
SMG4 Mario be like in Ohio: I don’t wanna do this...
Candice everyone: Candice?
Mario: CAN DEEZ NUTS FIT IN YOUR MOUTH!
What do you call a midget born from precum?
"Half Nut!"
Me rn: "Yo yo yo, for pre-K I went to K.I.S.S. a school."
My friend: "What is K.I.S.M.A.?"
Me: "K.I.S.M.A. balls!"
