Sexual experience jokes

My first high-school football game was a lot like my first time having sex...

I was bloody and sore at the end, but at least my dad came.

My first time sex was like buying my first used, crappy car.

I didn't want it, but Dad gave it to me anyway.

I lost my virginity to a girl with Down syndrome. I told my mom I wanted my first time to be special.

My German girlfriend likes to rate our sex between 1-10.

Last night we tried anal, she kept shouting 9!

That's the best I've done so far.

My German girlfriend likes to rate our sex on a scale of 1-10.

Last night we tried anal, and she kept shouting “9!”

That's the best I've done so far.

Did you ever receive an anonymous blowjob from another male under the handicapped stall inside the public men's restroom at a rest area and did you have an orgasm and was it the best orgasm that you ever had?

I have just started a sexual relationship with a blind woman. It's very rewarding, but quite challenging.

Took me ages to get her husband's voice right.

I asked the little German girl to rate our sex between 1-10. She kept crying and shouting "9!"

That's the best I've done so far.