Piece of wood jokes

When is a piece of wood made king?

When it's a ruler.

What do you call a bad piece of wood? Knotty.

Jesus was a carpenter who got nailed to a piece of wood.

If your hot dog tastes like a piece of wood, who are you going to call?

"Ghost Musterd."

If your hot dog taste like a piece of wood, who you gonna call?

GHOST MUSTERD

A depressed boy went to high five a tree, guess what the tree did?

The tree left him hanging.

If trees could kill you, they wood.

A guy walks into a magical forest looking to cut down a tree. The best one he can find is a magical talking tree. He holds his axe up ready to slice and begins to swing when the tree says, "Stop! I'm a magical tree. You can't cut me." "I'm a magical tree!" the man mocks, then as he goes to swing the axe he says, "You may be a magical tree... But you will dialogue!"

I was going to log a pun about trees, but you wooden understand it.

Friends are like trees, they fall over if you hit them with an ax.