Numeracy jokes

Did you hear about the dyslexic couple who were struggling to have sex? They kept doing the 96 positions.

Trump cut funding for Sesame Street.

I think he's jealous that the characters on Sesame Street can count to 10.

I hope when you count, you lose the number you were on.

A teacher asked his students a math question.

"You have one dollar. Your parents give you five dollars. How much money do you have?"

After some thinking, about half the class raised their hands. The teacher called on a little girl in the front.

"One dollar!" she said.

What do you call numbers that don’t stay in place?

Roamin’ Numerals.

I am right 95 percent of the time, who cares about that other 5 percent?

I bet you $12345678901234567890 that you didn't read that number and you didn't notice that I put a letter in it. No, I didn't, but you went back and looked, didn't you?

Maths...

....Addition, frustration, subtraction, aggression, depression.