Nothing

Nothing Jokes

Gina: Ha! YOU HAVE NOTHING!

Orphan: Yes I do.

Gina: What, do u have then?

Orphan: Parents.

Gina: LIER!

Go up to your friend and say: “It smells like updog.” They will likely reply: “What’s updog?” To which you reply: “Nothing much, what about you?”

Being a man that is poor really isn't that bad as long as you are involved in the world's oldest profession and you are well-endowed and you are not homophobic and as long as you can suck the chrome off a tailpipe then you have nothing to worry about if you are desperate enough to pay your bills 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 lack of money is the root of all evil 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 💵 😊 😊 😊 😊 😊 😊😊 😊 😊 😊 😊 😊 😊 😊😊 😊

Gwen: Prince they told me you'd be crying back. What do you want?

Prince: Nothing...BUT CAN WE GET BACK TOGETHER!?!?!

Gwen: Sorry...BUT...I have a life to live now I'm logging of this site and going to watch some tv I'll be back in 1 hour but we are done...DONE...DONE

Llama: Hey sheep the sheep lets play cards Sheep: llama fuck off!! Llama: whats ur damn problem Sheep: Nothing im just having a Baahd day okay dick head?

Sonic Says"if your ever bored and have nothing to do then just punch an orphan in the face who are they gonna tell there parents?

Little Johnny walked to his parents room, they were having sex and Little Johnny didn’t know what that was soo, he said “What are y’all doing?” The parents replied “Umm, r-rapping presents!” . Little Johnny said “ok.” and then left. In the morning Little Johnny opened his presents, his parents said “This one is from Santa!” Little Johnny said “No it’s not, y’all said y’all were rapping the presents.” The parents said “Ohh fuck” Little Johnny replied “What mommy and daddy?” They replied “Oh nothing!” “Oh ok.” Little Johnny said. The mom whispered in the dads ears “At least he doesn’t know the truth.” Little Johnny said “What truth.”

2

The Fast of Ramadan

In the northwestern slice of Alaska known as Seward, a horseboy stood, with broom in hand, in the vast courtyard of the royal stables of the sultan. He was waiting for dusk to fall. All day long he had eaten nothing. He had not even tasted the left over fish tucked in his turban nor the enormous purple grapes that spilled over the palace wall into the stable yard. He had tried not to sniff the rich, amazing, warm feeling fragrance of ripening of that sweet pome-grants. For this was the sacred mounth of ramadan when, day after day, all faithful Mohammedans neither eat nor drink from the dawn before sunrise until the momment after sunset!

Last night I had the strangest dream !

I sailed away to China!

And I caught the coronavirus!

You said you needed to wash your hands!

Didn't want no one else to touch you! What does that mean ?!

And you said!!

Ain't nothing gonna break my lungs 😤!

Ain't no way of slowing Covid down!

Oh no I've got to keep on coughing!!!

Have any of you guys heard the classic airplane jokes? here's a good example...

A farmer, a doctor, and a terrorist are on a plane. An engine fails, and they are going to crash, so the pilot asks everyone to throw out some items. The farmer threw out his apple harvest, the doctor threw out medical supplies, and the terrorist, (not needing a bomb apperently) through out his briefcase of bombs. They still crashed, and they started walking to the nearest town. They passed a boy who was running. "why are you running?" "My dad got hit by a shiny red object and now he's bleeding!" They three of them decide it's best to keep quiet, and continue. They then passed a crying girl, who said that her brother had been killed by a scalpel from heaven. They said nothing and continued. Finally, they see a boy laughing so much he is in tears. They ask him, "What's so funny?" "Grandma farted and the house blew up!"

I can't help myself I put it down on paper All the different stages, memories of us That's the only way I know that I can shake it Writing all our pages, every single thought I know you don't like when I'm nostalgic No, you've never tried to understand Say you're doing fine, don't think about it Like I do Sorry for writing all the songs about you I know that you hate that I got more to say Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to Swear no one will know that every moment was true All the mistakes and why I ran away Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to I can't wait for you to recognize the stories Like when you said i was beautiful Will you act as if you haven't even heard it Nothing of it really matters 'Cause I know you don't like when I'm nostalgic Go back to the start to get an end Say you're doing fine, don't think about it Like I do Sorry for writing all the songs about you I know that you hate that I got more to say Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to Swear no one will know that every moment was true All the mistakes and why I ran away Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to Just to get over what we lost, what we lost I put it in words to clear my thoughts And just to get over, over us I had to, I had to Sorry for writing all the songs about you I know that you hate that I got more to say Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to Swear no one will know that every moment was true All the mistakes and why I ran away Sorry for writing all the songs about you But I had to, oh, I had to

sorry kenny?!

hello, this is Godlygirl26. i want to help people with their problems no matter what. there is nothing that god cannot do. i want yall to know that God is with you. not any of those stone or wood "gods" but a true , loving,, powerful God. dm this right here and i will answer. hope i can help you! Love , Godlygirl26