What does a kid who has autism and reading have in common?
Absolutely nothing.
What’s the difference between a whale and Lizzo?
Absolutely nothing.
What is your name? What am I pointing at? 👃🏽 And what am I holding? Hahaha!!!!! Knows nothing.
Roses are red violets are blue polo G. is the goat but that means nothing to you
When ordering food at a new restaurant, my wife asked the waiter what they do to prepare their chicken.
“Nothing special,” he explained. “We just tell them they’re going to die.”
One night a guy asked his wife where she wanted to eat. She said, "Chinese food," so he flew her to China. The next night, he asked her what she wanted to eat. She said, "Indian food," so he flew her to India. The last night, he said, "What do you want to eat?" and she said she wanted nothing, so he flew her to Africa.
No one:
Nothing:
Not a single f***ing soul:
Spanish Empire: DING DONG YOUR RELIGION IS WRONG!
What's the difference between a penis and the bible? Nothing, the priest shoved them both down my throat.
Here are 20 jokes for you:
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
What did one wall say to the other wall? I'll meet you at the corner!
Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together!
Did you hear about the mathematician who's afraid of negative numbers? He'll stop at nothing to avoid them!
How does a bee style its hair? With a honeycomb!
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired!
What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta!
What's the difference between a snowman and a snowwoman? Snowballs!
Why don't eggs tell jokes? Because they might crack up!
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts!
What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner is on me!
Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!
Why don't seagulls fly over the bay? Because then they would be bagels!
Why was the math book sad? Because it had too many problems!
How does a computer get drunk? It takes screenshots!
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bull-dozer!
I hope these jokes brought a smile to your face! Let me know if you'd like to hear more.
Why did God steal a rib from Adam and make a woman out of it?
God wanted to show that nothing sensible can come of stealing!
I had asked my dog what 2 - 2 is... . . . . . . . . She said nothing....
Cool people: I can do anything.
Normal people: I can do nothing.
What's the difference between an abortion and a baby girl in China? Nothing, they both die.
what do a priest and a pedo nothing they both like kids.
What's the difference between a crumbled man and 9/11... nothing, they're both crumbled.
Don't listen.
What did the passengers of the plane say when they saw the airplane strip? Nothing, because it was not an airplane strip, but a tower.
There’s nothing funny about orphans, right?
Well, I guess that depends on your sense of humor.
Nothing makes a guy happier than when his girlfriend says, “Go and lock the door first...”
Why do Inbred White Trash Racists talk so much shit?
Answer: Because deep down inside, they KNOW that they are nothing but PATHETIC LOSERS!
