Narcissism jokes

I'm surprised BLESSEDBRIAN can fit through the door, considering how INFLATED his ego is.

Me: "WYD?"

Her: "Just dealing with a lot: depression, anxiety, and the feeling that I'll never be enough."

Me: "Without me? Lol"

What's long, hard, and full of semen?

Answer: Me.

I am a beautiful person.

It's ironic that the more other people love you, the more you hate yourself.

My friends: Ugh, why are you so lazy and no fun?

My parents: Why can't you be like your siblings?

My teacher: I don't care if you're depressed, focus on your study!

The songs: We understand you :)

What do you call a stalker stalking himself? A narcissist.

If I were addicted to masturbation, and then became addicted to sex, would it be safe to say that my addiction got out of hand?

My girlfriend treats me like God. -- She ignores my existence and only talks to me when she needs something.