Mort jokes

Woman: "Doctor, where are we going?"

Doctor: "To the morgue."

Woman: "I'm not dead yet, doctor."

Doctor: "We're not at the morgue yet, either."

What starts with M and ends with arriage?

Miscarriage. Now we all know that joke never gets old, and you know what?

Neither does the child.

What is the best cure for aging?

Suicide.

I hate how funerals are always at 9 a.m. -- I'm not really a mourning person.

Murder is the same as suicide, except the other person is doing it for you.