New You Memes - Page 80 - Worst Jokes Ever

Me on Monday morning with both my phone and computer

A picture of Kevin Hart with a sad expression. The text says: How you look when you wake up & the charger wasn't plugged in.

My brother when i slap him on the arm. But at the same time they are not about to grow up soft.

A man with a surprised expression has his finger in front of his lips, as if telling someone to be quiet. The text says "WHEN YOU SLAP YOUR LITTLE BROTHER AND HE STARTS TO CRY."

Teacher picks me because she/he knows i'm not listening

An image shows five gophers standing in a field. The gopher in the middle is in focus, with the other four gophers slightly behind. The text on the image reads "Why do you always pick me? There are others, ya know!"

Joke turned serious

A young child is looking confused with his hand on his cheek. The text above reads: "When you tell your parents a joke and it turns into a lecture."

When you overslept and can't find Noah

The image shows a dinosaur standing on a paddle board in the water, with the text 'When you overslept and can't find Noah'.

IZABELLA💖💖

//////.....

A close-up photo of a chipmunk with puffed cheeks. The text reads: "WHEN YOU ALREADY STARTED EATING AND SOMEONE SAYS 'LET'S PRAY'".

IZABELLA💖💖

...

frfr

A picture of a husky dog standing up among purple flowers with the text "YOU CAN'T SEE ME I'M A FLOWER" written in black on top and the bottom of the image.

TechPriestGotDrip

Man I hate it when companies do this crap, now you can't commit toaster bath anymore

A silver toaster is floating in space with a galaxy background. Text is written over the image: "New waterproof toaster."

TechPriestGotDrip

Toaster Strudel

A close-up shot of a Toaster Strudel with icing, placed on a white surface. Above the image, text reads: "Netflix: Are you still watching?" and "Somebody's Daughter:".

TechPriestGotDrip

The TRICKSTER

The image shows a character labeled "The Trickster" from a video game or fantasy setting. Above this character, text reads, "When you identify as a toaster so you can get in a bath with an emo girl."

TechPriestGotDrip

Or Holy Oils work

A picture shows a mechanical figure in a red hood holding a staff with a gear on top. The text on the image reads: "When you fixed a minor error on your computer by googling it. I hold the secrets of the machine spirit."

TechPriestGotDrip

I know them all, just like you keep busting onto your computer keyboard, that's why it's always got sticky keys

The image shows a disassembled car key at the top and a drawing of a mechanical character with glowing blue eyes with the text "I know the secrets of the machine". The caption at the top reads "when you learn how to disassemble your car key".

TechPriestGotDrip

I also got mine replaced, hehe, I have a special surprised for you UwU

The image is a four-panel grid. The first panel shows the text 'Male and Female' next to a figure in a red robe. The second panel shows 'Non-Binary' next to an identical figure. The third panel shows 'Impossible to tell under all the machinery and tubes' next to another identical figure. The fourth panel shows the text 'Gender is irrelevant meatbag, I have replaced my genitalia with a neutron laser' next to the same figure now raising its arms.

TechPriestGotDrip

Holy Omnissiah indeed

The image shows a four-panel comic. In the first panel, a person asks a large, muscular figure in red armor, "Wow! How did you get like that?" The second panel shows the same figure, with a text bubble saying, "Every time Adeptus Mechanicus posts a toaster meme." The third panel shows the muscular figure saying, "I do one push-up." The final panel shows the person from the first panel with wide eyes and the text, "Holy Omnissiah."

TechPriestGotDrip

When you turn 400 those nasty thoughts sometimes peer in, but if you're lucky, you can be cleansed by the machine spirit by simply visiting your local tech priest.

A picture of a cartoon character with white hair and a sly smile, with the text "Parents: are you still a virgin? The toaster:"

TechPriestGotDrip

Fine I'll soon turn this wasteland of a page into r/Admech and r/AdeptusMechanicus habitable sites by myself

The image shows two panels of a character that looks like a TechPriest from Warhammer 40k. The top panel has the text: "Use newly invented weapons that are superior than your current ones to assist the Imperium." The bottom panel has the text: "Putting them in storage for hundreds of years so you can claim that you can 'Rediscover Old Technology'."

TechPriestGotDrip

Now you must answer me with toaster memes so I can give them to The Omnissiah

A TechPriest character from Warhammer 40,000 is shown with the text "I showed you my toaster, answer."

HAHA

A cat sits with its paws folded in front of it at a table. The text above and below the cat reads: "Why don't you have a seat and explain where my testicles went."

OMG

A white and orange cat is sitting on a rocky surface outside, looking directly at the viewer. The text on the image reads: "WHEN YOU REALIZE YOUR HUMANS ARE TRYING TO BECOME YOU BY PRACTICING SOCIAL DISTANCING, STAYING HOME ALL THE TIME, AND CLEANING THEMSELVES OFTEN."