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Swf
11 months ago
The image shows two panels of the same picture of an older man with a slight smile, sitting at a laptop and holding a mug. The first panel says "Me registering my friend on a gay dating site." The second says "Email already used."
  • 0
  • Peter Griffin 2.0
    11 months ago

    what the

    FOLICE
Man Murdered 8 gang
members under an hour
after being told his sister
was raped
27 mins
US&anada
How bro must've felt:
245
Dislike
@Doodaaaaa Subscribe
Share
"Lil Vinny - Wanna Be Me Official
Bro is Mr. Aura himself
If We Being Real Yeat
  • 2
  • Heroin Monkey
    11 months ago
    FEBRUARY
Saturday
Right, I know it's been a while since I wrote in this,
but a whole lot has happened so let me fill you in on
everything.
Manny Heffley is the personification of human sin. Do
you wanna know the reason he tried to get me killed?
DATS FOWR NAWT
TEACHING ME HOW
TWO TIE MY SHOES,
YOU FUCKING PLOOPY.
I'M ONWEE
THWEE, BUBBY!
HEWP ME TIE MY
GAWDDAYUM
SHOES.
So I punted that little shit into the wall..
I should have paid more attention to Miom though, because
she actually stuck by her word for once. She managed to
shoot me in both legs and break i
my.
fucking kneecaps.
11
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    11 months ago
    The image shows a page from a diary with hand-written text and a small drawing of a person on a couch looking dejected.
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    11 months ago
    It's like 5:00pm, and Mom is driving me home as we
speak. I can't fucking believe that my mother is a
whore. I witnessed my own mother pleasing another man
and I feel disgusting.
During the ride, we didn't speak to each other for
about 30 minutes. All of a sudden, Mom asked if I
could forget everything that happened today. I said I
would, but I knew that this hoe could not step another
foot into this household.
GREG, LISTEN.
HOW ABOUT
WE FORGET
ABOUT WHAT
HAPPENED
TODAY?
YEAH, SURE.
WHATEVER.
@gabriel
She then asked me not to tell Dad about this. I said
I wouldn't, but you can't make a promise to a hoe who
breaks her wedding vows.
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    11 months ago
    MOM WHAT
THE FUCK!?
HOLY SHIT,
IT'S GREG!
MOM was GIVING HER WHOLE HEAD to Mr.
Winsky, and Vice Principal Roy is FUCKING DEAD!
As soon as I walked in these fuckers immediately acted
like they weren't just fucking crawling over each other.
That filthy homewrecker Mr. Winsky sent Mom and told
her to take me home. Fucking delinquents.
I have to tell Dad that Mom is a whore somehow. This
bitch needs to be sent to the streets.
3
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    11 months ago
    A black and white cartoon drawing depicting a text written in a diary, describing how Patty got a secret out, and then the person was sent to the vice principal's office. Then, the person heard a bouncing noise, laughter, and giggling, followed by two voices sounding like they were having sex in school. A drawing of a person standing in front of lockers is below the text. Another line of text says, "I opened the door, and oh boy, you'll be surprised about who I saw." A number "2" is at the bottom of the page.
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    11 months ago
    Monday
DECEMBER
Today was fucking dreadful.
Me and the boys were just watching porn on the
school computers in computer science. Nothing harmful.
You know how it goes, though. There's always s
bitch across the room, just waiting, dying to ruin the
fun.
Some
WHAT
GREG IS WATCHING
PORNOGRAPHY, MR
JIZZLE!
"PANT
PANT
THE
ZFUCK?!
The next time I see
snitch is fucking dead.
Patty, I swear to god, that
1
  • 1
  • Heroin Monkey
    11 months ago
    An image of Aladdin holding a magic lamp with a blue genie beside him. The text says, "Aladdin taught me that good things happen to those who rub one out."
  • 0
  • Anonymous
    11 months ago

    If only true Americans voted:

    A United States map is displayed with states colored red or blue to represent an election outcome. The legend shows Harris with 31 electoral votes and Trump with 337, suggesting a landslide victory for Trump. The user can select a party, show a toss-up, or a third party and see the state breakdown below.
  • 3
  • Anonymous
    11 months ago

    Guess which one I'm mad about.

    Two muscular arms clasped together in a strong handshake. The arm on the left with light skin is labeled "Modern Songs". The arm on the right with darker skin is labeled "Me Having Sex". In the middle, above the clasp, it is written "Less than 3 minutes."
  • 0
  • M
    Mr.Cheese47
    11 months ago

    cheese

    An image of a creature made from a cracked egg with legs, an eye, and the text "me at 3:00AM heading over to the fridge", "he travels", and "he seeks the parmesan".
  • 0
  • DAP ME UP
    1 year ago

    ?!?? TRIGGERED MUCH

    The image shows a conversation between a quiet kid and another person. The text reads: QUIET KID: I GOT MURDER ON MY MIND. ME: YEAH, ITS A REALLY NICE SONG. QUIET KID: WHAT SONG?. The background image is a man with a shocked expression.
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    A man standing in front of a brick wall while gesturing with his hands. The text above him reads: "me, a bricklayer, explaining to my apprentice (holding the camera) how I constructed this beautiful wall."
  • 0
  • MEME LORD
    1 year ago
    He threw a piece of bread at me so I flipped his
lil dumbass over. Fuck them kids
  • 1
  • TaylorSwiftBoat
    1 year ago
    E
r/Eminem
u/Kangar... . C'mon Let Me Ride - Skylar Grey Ft. Eminem...
J cole had pictures of Eminem in his bedroom
growing up alongside shirtless posters of other
men in the rap game he loved. Real recognize
real
THE
126
♡
16
readytudie
13
i_suck_a_lot +1.3h alongside shirtless posters of ot...
Reasonable-Night-875 3h
Pac's nipples are visible in the poster. I wonder if Cole
ever pretend to breastfeed off him, and called it 'drinking
GOAT milk'.
Reply
59
  • 0
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    A digital painting depicting a man lying wounded on the ground in front of a burning landscape with a medieval castle in the background. The text above reads: "6 year old me after trying my parents toothpaste instead of my strawberry rainbow unicorn toothpaste."
  • 1
  • Heroin Monkey
    1 year ago
    Two tweets are shown. The top tweet from Jon Favreau says: "Stop sending me pilots for your Star Wars series idea. I'm not that @Jon_Favreau." The second tweet from Jeffrey R. Epstein says: "I feel your pain."
  • 0
  • United Kingdom UK
    1 year ago
    The image is split into two panels. The top panel shows Spongebob looking scared with the caption "Me when my parents are sleeping." The bottom panel shows three black silhouette figures dancing on a colorful, lighted dance floor. The text above them says, "they're groovin'" and the caption to the right of the image reads "My parents when I'm sleeping."
  • 0
  • DAP ME UP
    1 year ago

    Rate my daily schedule

    The image shows a daily schedule. It lists activities from waking up at 6 AM to going to sleep at 3 or 4 AM, including school, meals, chores, and walking the dog. It also mentions snacks, specifically "3 grilled cheeses on hamburger buns."
  • 2
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