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Morning

17 views · shaylie lol · 2 years ago

A cartoon girl with messy hair looks groggy. Text above her says: "When ya momma wake u up in the morning and u fall back asleep and you hear her coming."

Bed

51 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

Flashlight

66 views · randomone · 2 years ago

Weaponization of flashlights

The image is a four-panel image featuring two characters. In the first panel, one character states "I have epilepsy." In the second panel the other character holds a card. In the third panel the first character says "Have a look at my flashlight in strobe mode". In the fourth panel the second character has an exaggerated frightened expression.

Monkey

5 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A drawing shows a monkey sitting in a "restraint chair" hooked up to tubes that deliver "drum n bass" and "iced coffee" to his brain. The monkey is also given "adderall" and a beer, "Miller High Life". He has a plate of "crab rangoon sustenance" in front of him. The monkey's hand is placed on a "response bar" facing the screen labelled "Twitter".

Case

385 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A screenshot of a Wikipedia article titled 'Enumclaw horse sex case.' The article details a 2005 incident where Kenneth D. Pinyan died from internal injuries after engaging in bestiality with a stallion. The article mentions other participants, James Michael Tait and Douglas Spink, and discusses the legal changes in Washington state prompted by the incident, including making bestiality a Class C felony. A map shows the location of Enumclaw, Washington State.

Abortion

623 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A green cartoon character shaped like a tombstone from the show 'Groovie Goolies' smiles while holding a large white bone in a graveyard scene. The text overlay reads: 'When you fuck a chick that's had 10 abortions. it was a graveyard smash.'

Prank

7 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A hand holds a clear, translucent polymer ball over a body of water, demonstrating its near-invisibility when submerged. Below the image, a text conversation on Tumblr describes a prank idea: first, putting invisible polymer balls in a bath to scare someone, and second, escalating the idea significantly to hiding large, shaped figures in every swimming pool in America.

Guy

19 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows four headshots of a young man with a somewhat chubby face. The post begins with a tweet, "#BigGuyTwitter step aside cuz the real big guy is here," followed by a comment from another user asking, "where's your neck Brandon?" and a reply from the first user "idk where's jake at?", which leads to a final comment "rest in peace jake 10/19/16".

Grade

4 views · Thoughtless · 2 years ago

dafuq?

A screenshot of a submission grade. The submission is from Jan 12 at 12:56pm. The grade is 8.181818181818182 out of 10 points possible. The submission was not graded anonymously. There are no comments.

Scooter

4 views · Moai🗿🗿 · 2 years ago

me

A screenshot from a video game shows a Spiderman character looking defeated. Two other characters stand in the distance. Text above says "Me when Left Tesitical, scooter, scooter 1 scooter McFly, scooter 22, scooter-6, scooter.10, and Scooter but on xbox", and text below says "Tells me to 'Kys'".

Friend

6 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A screenshot of the video game Elden Ring, showing a character with the name "****er", due to the game censoring the word "butt". The full character name should be Butter.

Access

8 views · Anonymous · 2 years ago

help im being nuked

The image is a screen capture of a computer interface with green text and symbols on a black background. In the top left is code. In the center is an aerial view of a city. In the bottom center is a green symbol with "NATIONAL INTELLIGENCE AGENCY" and "UNITED STATES OF AMERICA" written around it. On the right side are the words "Bitcoin Miner," "Password Cracker," "Remote Connection," and "Interpol Database" with associated symbols.

Graph

9 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

mmm I love desmos

A screenshot of the Desmos graphing calculator interface, showing a 3D graph of a cube made up of several sine and cosine equations. There is a list of the equations on the left and on the right the letters 'z' and 'y' are visible

Account

15 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The first part shows a tweet from the National Park Service stating: "You know it's cold outside when you go outside and it's cold." Below that is a reply from heychrisjones stating "Who is running this account?" The second part shows a reply from the National Park Service that contains an image. The image shows a marmot wearing a headset and sitting at a computer in an office setting.

Chicken

6 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A still from an animated movie. A man is shown with a suspicious look on his face, while a woman is standing behind him reading a book. Text at the bottom reads, "Those chickens are up to something. 10 Conspiracy Theories That Turned Out To Be True."

Corner

5 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

The image shows a text list titled 'Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator'. The list provides humorous and absurd actions to perform inside an elevator.

Corner

22 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A list of ten things to do in an elevator. The text reads: Top 10 Things To Do In An Elevator. 1. Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off. 2. Crack open your briefcase or purse, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?" 3. Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!" 4. Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on, ask them if they can hear ticking. 5. Stare, grinning at another passenger for a while, then announce, "I have new socks on". 6. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "Your one of THEM!" and back away slowly. 7. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask them to call you Admiral. 8. Dress up as the devil and then ask other people as they get in, "Going down?" 9. Drag a desk into the elevator. Ask "Do you have an appointment?" 10. Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."

Pasta

34 views · Kristian‽ · 2 years ago

for big dave fan

A man is presenting six plates with different pasta dishes on a table, next to a vertical ranking board. The text says: "What is the most Fuckable Pasta? I Fucked 6 different Pastas to Find Out!" and is presented on a Pornhub interface.

Bank

23 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A man in a suit and cap is walking on a cobblestone street. The text overlay provides a four-step process starting with: 1. borrow 10 billion from the bank. 2. buy the bank. 3. delete your own debt. 4. sell the bank.

Pasta

138 views · Heroin Monkey · 2 years ago

A screencap of a Pornhub video featuring a man standing in front of six plates of pasta. The title reads "What is the most fuckable pasta? I fucked 6 different pastas to find out!" The video has 134,867 views, an 88% rating, and was posted 10 months ago.

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