I ordered my sandwich at a restaurant on 9/11 spicy, it came out plain.
Last last, now everybody go chop breakfast.
How do you help a starving cannibal?
You give him a hand!
Why did two 4s skip dinner? Because they already ate.
What is an orphan's least liked meal? Family dinner.
It puts a whole new spin on meals on wheels. No pun intended.
Why do orphans have water with their cereal? Because their dad never came back with the milk.
Don't you just hate when you have to eat cereal with water because your dad won't bring the fucking milk? Cause same.
Your mum is so fat, she eats every meal from KFC, Maccas, Hungry Jacks all at once!
Can emos eat a happy meal, or is it a depressed meal?
You know why morning food digests so quickly.
Because it breaks fast.
Why can the orphan only go to restaurants?
Because they can't have homemade meals.
What's the worst part about burning your vegetables before dinner?
Explaining what happened to the nursing home while you're hungry.
Yo mama's so fat, when she skips a meal, the stock market drops.
So the man asks me, "Jesus, how do you want your steak?"
So I said, "Well done, my good faithful servant, well done."
What did the guest say when he arrived at the peanut butter's dinner party?
“Nice spread!”
I offered to share a meal with a homeless person once, but he said, "Piss off and buy your own!"
An old man walks to a busy restaurant. He tells the waiter what he wants and asks her, "Can I have a discount? I served in the war."
The waitress says, "Of course, and would you like that meal with sauce?"
"Nein," said the old man.
What's a ghost's favorite food?
I like some boo-ritos!
Why can't orphans eat at a family restaurant?
Because there is no family.
