Living situation jokes

Kenny is living with his girlfriend now.

He just moved back in with his mom.

I got a roommate. He killed a butterfly, and I said no butter for a week. The next day, he killed a cockroach. Son of a bitch, nice try.

Why can’t orphans play baseball?

They don’t know where home is.

Why don't orphans play baseball?

Because they can't find home.

When meeting her parents doesn't require you to leave the house.

Why do some couples make their status "single" after a small argument? Like, I don't put "orphan" after I get into an argument with my family.

My mom told me it's not healthy to stay in my room all day... but the only places I'm allowed to go to are my room and downstairs.

A friend of mine just got divorced. He and his ex-wife split the house. He got the outside.

Police: Where do you live? Blonde: With my parents. Police: Where do your parents live? Blonde: With me. Police: Where do you all live? Blonde: Together. Police: Where is your house? Blonde: Next to my neighbor's house. Police: Where is your neighbor's house? Blonde: If I tell you, you won't believe me. Police: Tell me. Blonde: Next to my house.