Key jokes

The other day, I donated my car keys, $1,000, and a passport to a homeless man.

You could feel the happiness come from me after he holstered his suppressed shotgun.

What's an alien's favorite computer key?

The space bar!

Person 1: How the freak did you get in my house?!?! I locked the door!!!

Person 2: But I'm your mom... I have a key. You dumbass.

Where is the worst place to lock your keys in your car?

The anti-abortion clinic because you have to go back in and ask for a coat hanger.

What does Stephen Hawking press after he's had a hard day?

F5

Mary had a little lamb.

Key word is had, her dad's favorite meat is a human!

One day Johnae said, "What do you call a family outing?"

"Incest."

Low key Johnae fucks Kirby and Peach.

What is the difference between a man peering through the key hole and a woman in the bath?

One is rude and nosy; the other is rude and nosy.

How are a woman and a car alike? Put something in them and they'll both start.

I love the smell of my F5 key. It's very refreshing.