IT jokes
Why did Michael Jackson love melted chocolate? Because he could pour it on his cock, then get a prepubescent boy to suck it off.
What do dark humor and food have in common?
Some get it, some don't.
Timmy: Stupid motherfucker.
Jimmy: Wow, do you kiss your mother with that mouth?
Timmy: *starts crying*
Jimmy: Ah fuck, I did it again.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
You tell it to clap until his/her parents are back.
What do parents and dark humor have in common? Some get it, and some don't.
How many orphans does it take to repair a house? None, they don't have one.
I'm an orphan, please stop it. It's not nice and it made me cry.
A man and a giraffe walk into a bar.
After a few drinks, the giraffe falls over and dies. The man begins to walk out when the bartender stops him.
“Hey, you can’t leave that lyin’ there!” The bartender yells out.
The man turns around: “It’s not a lion. It’s a giraffe.”
Best friend *holds a sign up that says "what gender are you?"*
Me: Uh, male?..
Best friend *then unfolds paper so it reads "what gender are you attracted to?"*
Me: You silly goose.
*Silence for like three seconds*
Me: Still male though-
I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back.
Why was the orphan so successful? When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.
What’s the only advantage of being an orphan? Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.
My wife left a note on the fridge that said, “This isn’t working.”
I’m not sure what she’s talking about. I opened the fridge door, and it’s working fine!
Violence is never the answer:
It's the solution.
What do genders and the Twin Towers have in common?
There used to be two, but now it's a touchy subject.
What does a Rubik's cube and a man's penis have in common?
The more you play with it, the harder it gets.
What do you say when you see your TV floating away at night?
"Drop it, Jamal!"
Your hairline is so far back that it killed the dinosaurs.
Yo mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, "To Be Continued."
What's an orphan's favorite toy?
A boomerang because it's the only thing that comes back to it.
So an emo shot themselves, and so the detective decides to ask why, but it just goes in one ear and out the other.
Guy, it was so weird yesterday. I saw a guy, and he kept repeating the same thing over and over. I hate people with dementia. I told my mom to get a new mirror, but she won’t listen to me. It’s almost like I said it like 20 times every time I say it.