Heat jokes
Why was the mountain in love with the volcano?
Because the volcano was hot!
Did you get your phone from the desert? No wonder why your texts are always so dry.
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
They drop FIRE TRACKS.
If your house is cold, just stand in the corner. It's always 90 degrees there.
How do butts stay cool in the summer?
They stay in crack conditioning.
How do rappers stay warm in the winter?
They spit HOT FIRE!
Why did the rapper wear sunglasses to the concert?
Because his lyrics were so fire, he needed protection!
How do rappers stay cool in the studio?
They turn on the mic and DROP THE HEAT!
Why did the rapper become a weatherman?
To predict the HEAT of his next single.
What did the rapper say to his microwave?
"Yo, heat it up, fam!"
How does a rapper make tea?
He drops some HOT BARS into a cup.
How do rappers stay cool in the summer?
They drop ICE COLD rhymes.
Lucifer's so broke he can't even afford air conditioning units.
You're in Australia. Your forehead is the reason why Africa is so hot.
I hate when people leave their cars running, especially in the summer.
I'm like, "You got Tracy Latimer in there or something?"
What do you call a wheelchair on fire?
Hot wheels.
What is the difference between me and a fire?
It's hot.
You like bread toasted? That means you're roasted.
The little camel asks his mother: "Mum, why do we have these big humps?"
"Because in these humps there is some water, and in the hot desert we can drink."
"And Mum, why do we have this large fur?"
"Because the desert at night is so cold, and then we don’t feel cold."
"And Mum, why do we got these big hoofs?"
"Because the desert sand is hot, and the hoofs save us from the hot sand."
"But Mum, what the fuck are we doing here in the national zoo?"
I lit my girlfriend on fire. I guess you could say I ignited her fire.