Gambling Jokes

Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.

If you give a prostitute money you will go to jail but if you give a prostitute a klondike bar you will not go to jail I would rather go to the casino and get more money for my buck

True fact: Five out of six people think Russian roulette is safe. (Russian roulette is a game where you put 1 bullet in a pistol that has 6 chambers each person spins it and try not to land on the bullet to find out if you got the bullet or not you point the gun at yourself and pull the trigger)


A guy walks into a butcher's shop and says "Sir, are you a gambling man?" The butcher says, "Why yes, as a matter of fact I am." "Then I'll bet you $25 you can't reach up and touch that meat hanging over your head right there." The butcher thinks for a moment and says, "I'm sorry, I won't take that bet." The guy says, "But I thought you said you were a gambling man." "I am. But the steaks are too high."