someone i know is an ant. i feel like a mountain to them.
Whats black and white and red all over? The darkness of your heart, the dishonour of your lies, and the embarrassment you feel when busted for both.
I saw a girl with blond hair. she was sexy and beautiful. I thought she was the most hottest girl I ever saw. So I ran up to her feeling hot
Why does Darth Vader always choke people? Because he wants them to feel what his Sith Lord does to him in bed.
Your hairline is so crooked that it made will smith feel straight
The little camel asks his mother: Mum why do we have these big humps? Because in these hump there is some water and in the hot desert we can drink. And mum. Why do we have this large fur? Because the dessert at night is so cold and then we don’t feel cold. And mum. Why do we got these big hoofs. Because the desert the sand is hot and the hoofs save us from the hot sand. But mum. What the fuck are we doing here in the national zoo?
When butterflies fall in love, do they feel humans in their stomach?
sometimes i feel ugly then remember i have a brother then i feel better
I kinda feel sorry for Hitler.
Looking back at some old photos of him, his friends always left him hanging when he went for a high-five.
GOOD MORNING USA!!!! I GOT A FEELING THAT IVE SEEN A FUCKIN NlGGER TODAY!!!
Friend: I broke up with Sara.
Me: I know, she came over and I screwed her hard.
Friend: How did her p*ssy feel?
Me: After about 2 inches, it felt brand new.
Friend: What do you— HOLD UP. WHAT TF IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?!?!
YOUR SO POOR THAT HOMELESS PEOPLE FEEL SORRY FOR YOU
