Fatherhood jokes
I remember when I saw my dad's penis for the first time.
I said, "Dad, don't text me shit like that."
You will find your dad that left to get the milk before your hairline.
Why do Black people go to a confession stand at the Catholic Church?
They wanna know what it’s like to speak to a father.
What’s worse than finger banging your sister?
Finding your dad’s wedding ring.
Son: Dad, where are you?
Dad: Getting another one.
Son: Getting what?
Dad: Dad.
Son: “Dad, did you get the results of the DNA test back?”
Dad: “Call me George.”
TV Darth Vader: "I'm your father!"
Orphans: "Yea."
I dressed up as Darth Vader at an orphanage and said, "I am your father!"
They don't call priests "daddy," they call me daddy.
Why do orphans go to church? So that they can call someone Father.
Why do orphans love to go to church? Because they have someone to call father.
Why did the orphan go to church?
Because they need a father.
My dad is so good at hiding, even the FBI can't find him.
I worry about him sometimes.
Batman: I’m vengeance.
Dad: Hi Vengeance, I’m dad.
Batman: ...
Dad: Son, it’s been 20 years, please let go.
Why do orphans like Darth Vader?
So he can say, "I'm your father!"
Why does an orphan never learn how to drive? Because he has no dad to help him.
Why do fathers take an extra pair of socks when they go golfing?
In case they get a hole in one!
Dad?
Why does the orphan go to church? He needs someone to call father.
Why does an orphan like church so much? So he can call someone "father."