Family jokes
The one good thing about an orphan is that they don't get roasted with a "yo mama" joke.
I'm black, and I have a dying family in my basement that hasn't eaten in 2 weeks. They need help.
Btw, it's a joke lol.
Do you want to know why they call it an orphanage? Because they couldn't call it orphans home.
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed? Tell them to clap til' their parents get home.
Why do orphans like the iPhone 12 Pro?
Because there is no home button.
Meant to say my friend's nan, not man.
When she says "parents aren't home" so you rush upstairs.
I traded my sister for a slice of pizza. Damn, that pizza was good!
Why do orphans love going to church?
Because they can call someone "father."
What does an orphan and a female's mouth have in common?
They take in 100's of kids.
He probably picks hair off his dad’s dick, then probably puts it in his hair.
I called my mom on Alexa, and she told me, "Please take out the trash." I said, "But I can't, you're not here."
Parent: My parents never attended my birthdays.
Birthday girl: Oh wow!
Parent: Anyone missing?
Birthday girl: Your parents.
Guess what I got from my uncle this Christmas? Herpes.
I always wanted to go to the store as a kid because I always wanted to look for my dad that went to go get the milk, but I could never find him.
Kid: Hey, Dad.
Dad: You're an hour late.
Kid: No, it was two hours. Also, I was working on math.
Dad: By yourself?
Kid: No.
Dad: A boy?
Kid: I was with the teacher.
If Kenny had a son, we all know he would also be his brother.
Yo dad is so hairy, people chased him because they thought he was Bigfoot.
What is an orphan's least favorite snack?
"Dots HOMESTYLE Pretzels!"
Grandpa: "You can't have phones within 15 feet of the table."
Me: "And you aren't allowed within 100 feet of the elementary school."