Family jokes
Why didn’t the train kill nine families of four?
Because he had no loco-MOTIVE. AHAHAH
What’s worse than banging your sister?
Having to wear your dad’s wedding ring.
What stresses a baby strawberry out?
When its mom is in a jam.
Your mama's like a cardboard box: open to the public and easy to nail.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not your dad.
What is the difference between the pizza guy and my dad?
The pizza guy shows up when you call him.
"Dad, did you get a haircut?"
"No, I got them all cut!"
Brings a whole new meaning to brotherly love.
Why do some kids have water with their cereal?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.
How do you make a mime cry?
You kill his family right in front of his stupid face.
What's the difference between child abuse and abandonment?
The abused ones are forced to listen while being abused, while abandoned kids cry because they don't have parents anymore.
My sister is so stupid, she thought LBJ was a blow job.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
They can't see their parents.
What's your mom and a dog got in common?
Both will lick dick if you put peanut butter on it.
What do you get when you cross a corrupt lawyer with a crooked politician?
Chelsea Clinton.
Father talks to his 5-year-old son: “No, Petie, you don’t have to worry. There is no monster sleeping under your bed. It sleeps every day in the bed next to me.”
About a month ago, I was at my best friend’s funeral and I told him, "Bitches always come and go." He looked at me kinda mad, kinda confused, and said, "That’s my mom, dude."
What does your mom say when she is working?
Nothing, it's rude to talk with your mouth full.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? They have no home to run to.
Get it?
The legs are soft and delicious.
How much can you earn in Selkan Toko Na Sinsel? Njpopularnijssa bronia jost. My grandma was already eto nasaba of the other sachan without me. Then you will be satisfied.