Family jokes
What did the mom tell her son when he asked for a bowl of cereal? "Sorry your dad wasn't came back with the milk yet."
Why can’t orphans be gay?
They have nobody to call "daddy."
Why do orphans never use other people's Wi-Fi?
So they can be connected.
I saw an orphan and asked them if they had parent permission.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they have no home to run to.
Ur mom.
Oh wait, you don't have one.
What song do orphans hate the most? "We are family."
What is hard to find but easy to make?
An orphan.
Thanks for the birthday wishes. It's been an odd one this year, as some of you know, my father suddenly passed away on my birthday last year, and anyone who knew the old man knew he had a sledgehammer wit!
Good on ya dad, ya definitely got the last laugh!
What did the bison say to his son when he left the ranch? Bi-son.
Two girls have a sleepover.
Karen: Let's go to bed.
Lauren: Fine, but it's early.
*Karen wakes up and exits room*
*Lauren hears noise*
Mikey: You're so much better than my girlfriend, Karen.
Lauren: *laughs*
Lauren: *remembers her boyfriend is Karen's brother, Mikey*
What is similar about the feelings of a girl's birth daddy and her new pimp daddy?
They both worry about how she will turn out!
My dad is like a unicorn.
He's never here. :c
Why can’t orphans have sex?
They have no one to call “daddy.”
My autistic son hates taking baths or showers.
I don’t blame him, I don’t like soggy vegetables either.
Why can’t orphans be a space ship? Because they don’t have a mothership!
Do you know the TV show "Naked and Afraid?" Well, that's what my grandpa and I played when I was young.
I bought my son a trampoline. That little a**hole stayed in his wheelchair the whole day.
Why are orphans so bad at poker?
They don’t know what a full house looks like.
How do you make a mime cry?
You kill his family right in front of his stupid face.