Evasion jokes

I wasn't planning on going on a run, but those cops showed up out of nowhere.

I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere.

I wasn’t planning on going for a run today, but those cops came out of nowhere.

I got the joke from my brother.

Child abortion is like tax evasion: the more you lose, the less problems you have.

To the man in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket, "You can hide but you can't run."

Three citizens were going through an exam to become agents of the FBI. Their instructor handed the first guy a gun in a room with his wife and said he had to shoot her. He walked out in shame and said he couldn't do it. The second guy had the same scenario. He put the gun up, but couldn't pull the trigger, so he walked out in shame. The third guy was put in the same scenario. He walked out and told the instructor, "The gun wasn't loaded, I had to strangle the bitch."

To the guy in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket... You can hide, but you can't run.

Someone asked me why I'm still here... the answer is simple: I don't want to be used as a school assembly.

Why can't a cheetah play hide and seek?

Because he's always spotted.