Do jokes
Boss: Can I do a reference check?
Me: I don’t have a...
*sensei appears*
Me: oh no
Sensei: He was a good student, but he lacked kizma.
Boss: What's kiz...
Sensei:😈
Me: Oh no, here we go.
Sensei: Kizma AS-
Why do people consume "Laxatives"?
Answer: So that they can take a "Shit", STUPID!
What do you call a terrorist in a wheelchair?
An RC-XD.
What do you call a white man that’s blind?
Asian eyes.
What do you call Helen Keller after she killed 10 people?
Helen Killer.
How do you give an "Alabama Girl" a nice compliment?
Answer: You say to her, "Hey, NICE TOOTH!"
Why do animals cross the road?
Because it is funny, do you say "dogs" and "cats?"
What do world hunger and a Mercedes have in common?
Diana can't stop either.
When I saw someone jump out of one of the towers, I yelled, "Do a flip!"
Me: *sprays some perfume on myself*
Friend: Omg, that smells so good! You’re so aromatic, how do you not have a bf yet?
Me: ... I’m aromantic and aromatic. I do not desire romantic relationships with others although I do enjoy carrying lovely scents with me.
Someone asked the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton why she lost the 2016 presidential election to Donald John Trump, and the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton said, "Because someone asked her what she would do for a Klondike Bar?"
What do you call a rapper who works in the bakery?
DOUGH-KNIGHT
What do you call a rapper who LOVES to read?
50 Cents of Gray.
How do you know if a rapper's broke?
When he starts dropping cents instead of bars.
How do rappers stay organized?
They keep their rap sheets in order.
Do you think the founder of Dunlop was a retired tree surgeon or a hairdresser?
SMG4 Mario be like in Ohio: I don’t wanna do this...
Candice everyone: Candice?
Mario: CAN DEEZ NUTS FIT IN YOUR MOUTH!
Why do they call Melania Trump the "Walk-In Freezer"?
Answer: Because it's where EVERYONE GOES to "Hang Their Meat!"
The power of yeet.
I can't do this - YEET!
I'm not good at this - YEET!
I'm not old enough - YEET!
Do you remember what Bruce Willis' last movies were?
Neither does he.