Do jokes

Orphan

If you are ever mad, punch an orphan.

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Speech

What do cheap people use to talk?

Free speech.

China, unban Google, r.n. noOoOooOw!

Teacher

I'm a teacher at a high school, but I got fired. They told me I didn't do any work even though I always did a skele-ton.

Dog

Why do dogs howl?

Because that's the only contraction they know.

Cash

Why do you pay cash for the metro train in Newcastle upon Tyne?

Baby

What do you call a baby in the crib?

Boys and girls watch Monsters, Inc.