Deceased jokes

A man is telling his story to someone. "My friends always said that they would kill me if I wore Gucci or Supreme. On April 1st, I wore both and conversed with them."

"Interesting."

"That's the story of how I got to the morgue," he says to The Gatekeeper of Heaven.

Why doesn’t Helen Keller go to the optometrist?

Because she’s dead.

Why is Technoblade allowed to make jokes about orphans?

'Cause he's dead like their parents!

What did the people do to the deceased after tests?

They bari-um.

You don't want to know why it takes so long to put a dead woman in a mass-produced coffin in a pre-buried grave dug by machinery that is then filled by mourners.

Cremation,

The last chance for a smoking hot body.

What happened when the man died? Yes.

How does the dog dance?

He doesn't... he's dead.

There was an air crash of a Boeing 737-800 which can carry around 300 passengers.

It crashed in a cemetery.

They recovered 500 bodies.

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He's dead now.

Dead.

What do you call dead?

(Not Michael Jackson)

What do you call someone smart and dead?

Stephen Hawking...

Why can’t Helen Keller have kids?

Answer: She’s dead.

What's the best part about a dead hooker? The second hour is free!

What did Michael Jackson say?

Nothing, he's dead.