What do you call people from Paris?
Parasites.
Luigi and Daisy are actually Aussie! How?
They wear GREEN and GOLD! The Aussie Colors!
I would make a joke about America... However, the fact it exists is a joke in itself.
My friend told me to name a country in Africa.
So I said, "Hungry."
Why do Indians hate snow?
Because it's white and all over their land.
As an actor going to film a new TV show in another country, when TSA asks, "What’s the purpose of your visit?"... "I’m going to shoot a pilot" is never a good answer.
When your gf tells you to treat her like a queen,
and then you remember you’re French.
Literally every movie:
"I love you." "I love you, too."
My life:
My 'friends': "Hey, Hailey likes you!" Him: "Wtf, I have a girlfriend, sorry not sorry." His friends: Spreads the word throughout the whole goddamn country. 😶
I'd love to move to a country ruled by Scott Stapp of Creed. Not only is it a place with golden streets, but it also welcomes people of all kinds with arms wide open.
What’s a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross-country.
Why doesn't the orphan have a nationality?
He doesn't have a motherland.
Are you a cheese 🧀 from Denmark? Because your "guta."
1. Full name: John.
2. Proverb: work is not a rabbit, does not run.
3. Favorite meal: the sphinx with the sour cream.
4. Sexual orientation: sexually disorientated.
5. Mental health: mentally retarded.
6. Previous careers: funeral undertaking, after that two years in the circus as the main brown bear, after that in the church school for two years, after this experience five years as a screw in the jail for the worst criminals with the top degree of supervision and now working for the secret services in my home country after gaining the top-secret audit.
7. Favorite pets: dog, bumble bee named Maxo, a butterfly named Redwing and the lizard named Notail.
8. Favorite activities: washing the dishes, cutting the woods, vacuuming and playing hard rock.
9. Working motivation: none.
I hope that you will accept my curriculum vitae and that we will see each other soon already as new colleagues, I wish more or less. Kind regards, John.
When you’re in India and you start hearing a tick, tick, tick, tick, you run!
Q: Why aren't there any Walmarts in Afghanistan?
A: Because there's a Target on every corner.
Bye, I'm Paul Badman. Did you know that you don't have rights? The Articles of Confederation say you don't, and so do I. I believe that until proven innocent, every woman, man, and adult in this country is guilty. And that's why I don't fight for you, Santa Fe!
What does a foreigner say when he comes to America?
I don't know, I don't speak foreignish...
Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do, and so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman, and child in this country is innocent, and that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!
How do you know when it's bedtime in the Netherlands?
When the big hand touches the little hand.
I can’t remember if I already said this or not. I might have already said this. Also, this is a true story.
So, I’m walking into a store in Amish country, and there’s this guy with a bear trap. Then my mom’s friend says, "This guy’s gonna catch some bears." Then the Amish guy stops, looks around, and whispers, “It’s for democrats.”
