Condom factory jokes

Condom

The popular girl told me, "I bet your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory!"

Two weeks later, she shows up pregnant.

...

I guess her rubber broke too.

Birth Certificate

Little off topic but...

Mum: You wouldn't be here without me.

Son: And my birth certificate is a sorry letter from the condom factory.

Mum: Fair point.

Rubber

A condom and bungee jumping are exactly alike, if the rubber breaks, you're f**ked.

  • 8
  • Dildo

    Head of Company: "We need to stop testing our products on animals."

    Consultant: "Why? The shampoo companies do it."

    Head of Company: "Yeah, but we make dildos."

    Condom

    What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms? One’s a Goodyear. The other’s a great year.

  • 3
  • Incest

    When Bubba's condom broke, he spent a lot of sleepless nights wondering if he was going to be an uncle or a dad.

  • 1
  • Condom

    Why did they invent glow-in-the-dark condoms? So gay guys can play Star Wars.