Cold jokes
Harder than a diamond in an ice storm.
What do you call a cold Explain bear?
A brrr.
What does a burnt pizza, cold beer, and a pregnant woman have in common?
Someone didn’t pull it out in time.
I'm so jealous of babies with anencephaly.
They can eat all the ice cream they want and never get brain freezes.
Why is there air conditioning in hospitals?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.
Why do hospitals have air conditioning?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.
Why do men give cold women their jackets?
No man wants a blowjob from a woman with chattering teeth.
Why was the rapper cold in the recording studio?
Because his bars were ice.
What do you call an Eskimo stripper?
A frosty-tute.
Q: What is the difference between two bottles of Whiskey and 2 pretty feminist girls?
A: You don't leave the bottles in the cold and dark forest after you and your 9 friends are finished with them.
If your house is cold, just stand in the corner. It's always 90 degrees there.
What do you call a necrophiliac gangbang?
Cracking open a cold one with the boys.
Sex is like pizza.
When it’s hot, it’s great.
When it’s cold, it’s still pretty good.
Why don’t rappers ever get cold?
Because they have so many fans!
What do you call it when a rapper has a cold?
A sniff beat.
How are corpses like pools?
Once you get in, it's only cold for like a minute.
What do you call a rapper with a cold?
Lil Sneezy.
How do you find a rapper in a snowstorm?
Look for the one with the "ICE-COLD RHYMES."
What do you call a rapper who's always cold?
Chill MC.
What do alcoholics and necrophiliacs have in common?
They both like cracking open a cold one.